Todays Daily Bread

I had an 'ah-huh' moment this morning during my quiet time. I read 2 devotionals when I wake in the mornings. One is 'Jesus Calling' by Sarah Young. Beautiful. The under title is 'Enjoying peace in His presence' and it does open my eyes to do just that. I have given numerous copies if this book away too - we could all do with more peace right? :-) It also has a couple if scripture references to line up with the days reading, to reaffirm what Jesus is calling to you in His word. I like that. The second is one that challenges me. 'My utmost for His highest' by Oswald Chambers. The copy I have is a pocket one I stole from hubby. It was given to him as a gift by a beautiful couple, back in 2005 (the front page tells me!) A lot of the times, this deep thinker goes over my head, but I often find a sentence or two that God speaks directly to me through. I love that my prayer partner also LOVES this book - and her copy is nearly 50years old I think she said? And she says the book is still teaching her.... So todays 'ah-huh' came from my utmost - under todays date if you are reading along at home :-D Sept 11. Lately I have struggled with our purpose here. Mainly mine, in raising kids. For my eldest 2 kids, I put all time, energy, heart, strength etc into making them the best kids possible. It took a lot - and I confess I made an idol if them. The eldest especially. God popped my illusion bubble of 'I'm in control here' a few years back (Praise God) and so I've really relaxed in the huge task of pressuring my kids to be the best. Will share that story another time. But now, I struggle with the time I have with my 3 year old at home. Only yesterday, while baby slept, 3yo and I had time together. What I wanted to do - was chuck on a kids DVD and have me time to read Gods word. I can't seem to satisfy this God given hunger for it these days! Weird! But instead, I tried a few more practical activities. It was SO difficult. My brain ran a million miles an hour and scoffed at my 'waste' of time. We tried Lego, cards, ball game outside, filling balloons with water (his favourite) and in the end - he asked me to read, while he watched a DVD. Ha! And so, I question this role as mother. Am I doing what you want God? I appreciate the time I am blessed to share with my kids, but it is not challenging me anymore. I know that when they reach school age, they all pretty much are at the same level anyway right? My Utmost: "Notice the kind of people that God brings around you, and you will be humiliated once you realise that this is actually His way of revealing to you the kind of person you have been to Him. Now He says we should exhibit to those around us exactly what He has exhibited to us." Wow. "The very character we exhibit in our present surroundings is an indication of what we will be like in other surroundings. The things Jesus did were the most menial of everyday tasks, and this is an indication that it takes all God's power in me to accomplish even the most common tasks in His way." It goes on about trying to prepare who you are in a hard time is like trying to make weapons in the trenches. We won't last. So what are those who are near me teaching me? How are they showing how I treat God? So often I am humbled that God is patient and sitting by me while I learn what He already knows. Just being beside me and being available when I need Him is comforting. So must I persue with my 3yo. One of the greatest things I want to teach him while I am home with him is that mum (and dad) are here to help and guide and teach and direct. We desire to talk to our children. When my kids test my patience, with being disobedient and feeling I am reteaching over and over, I will remember how many times I too need to relearn lessons! And when my kids forget all I do, have done, have given up and sacrificed for them - I will shoot a prayer heavenward thanking my Heavenly Father for all He us still doing, has done, has given up and sacrificed for me. ThankYou for this bread Lord. ThankYou for your gift if humbleness. ThankYou for your disciplines. ThankYou for sitting by my side and teaching me again and again. xK